rice & beans, day 18

We took a break from eating Rice & Beans on Saturday. We went hiking with our extended family and ate Chick-fil-a breakfast on the way to the Buffalo River. Melody exclaimed from the back seat of the van, "This is the best food in the whole world!!!!" (She usually doesn't care for Chick-fil-a.) Once at the Buffalo we shared trail mix, apples, hot dogs, and s'mores. It all tasted really good to our family.

Last night I hung out with two girl friends. Typically we drink some wine or eat candy together when we hang out. Last night we had just water. I kept craving candy. I knew my friend probably had some in her pantry, but I refrained from asking. We visited for a few hours, talking, sharing, laughing, but not eating anything. What a concept, huh? Again, I felt triumphant when I left her home. Also, I didn't have gross feeling in my stomach from eating too many gummy lifesavers either.

A few days ago we received the devotional book A Common Meal.



This morning I read a few pages and wanted to share a couple of quotes:
It can be easy in this modern time to exist in a protected world with little or no real contact with suffering people. But if we open our eyes and leave our isolation we come face to face with the homeless, the hungry, the immigrants, the outcasts, and the sick.

Luke 3:10-11 "What should we do then?" the crowd asked. John answered, "Anyone who has two shirts should share with the one who has none, and anyone who has food should do the same."

And here is Logan playing in red lentils he poured all over the kitchen floor while I was in another room for a few minutes.

day 16 & a broken arm

Today was the hardest day of the month. I wanted to go out to eat so badly. I was craving a Chili's cheeseburger, fries and a coke!!! Last Friday Logan fell out of a high chair. I suspected his arm was fractured. The weekend went by and he was fine except for favoring it in certain situations. On Tuesday I took him to the doctor. She said it was sprained, not broken. Two days later, I still had a feeling something was wrong. Even though Logan was using the arm to climb, crawl, and play, he was favoring it while he walked. He'd hold the hurt arm against his belly and swing the uninjured arm wildly for balance. I took him for an x-ray today and it is fractured at the wrist. He has the cutest, smallest, black cast I've ever seen.

We spent a total of five hours in multiple waiting rooms. Logan was a champ. I had books, snacks, and toys and I worked hard at keeping him occupied. When it was over I was worn out. I felt emotional because it had been seven days since the initial injury. We finally got home and discovered the ice maker in the fridge had leaked water all over the kitchen floor! I wanted to go out to eat so badly. I even would have been delighted to have frozen pizza (two of which are in our freezer). I asked Chad what he thought. He said we should eat the left over Dal (red lentils) from yesterday. I agreed. We moped up the water on the floor, made more rice and we ate Dal.

When I have a hard day, my immediate response is that I deserve something good to eat. A mocha, ice cream, a burger, sushi, candy. The list goes on. After today's events, it felt unnatural to come home and eat leftover lentils. As absurd as it sounds, I felt like I deserved to go to Chili's. I am glad we didn't go out. We triumphed over something that has been ingrained in me since childhood.

Today we received the devotional made for Rice & Beans Month. It is titled A Common Meal. The words on the back of the book are good stuff. It says,

Encounter a table where feasting and fasting
intertwine, and let your love for the vulnerable
become as tangible as a bowl of rice and beans.

rice & beans, day 13

Rice and Beans month is almost half way over. The second week was more challenging than the first, especially for the girls. They are really tired of eating Rice and Beans. The adventure has worn off. I am struggling to motivate them. I feel like I say the exact same thing over and over again. I feel strongly not to discipline them for not wanting to eat rice and beans. They did not choose to do this. We choose it for them. I understand that it is difficult.

We took the weekend off, eating pizza, ice cream and donuts with our friends. Everything tasted great. When Monday came, it was difficult to eat the rice and beans again. Mel and I had a conversation about how it is difficult to explain Rice & Beans Month to people. She said she was sharing about it with two boys her age. After she talked about it for awhile they just got up and walked away. I think this might have had more to do with their age and gender than with Rice & Beans month! But I have found the same thing. When people ask me why we are doing this, I struggle to explain it.

We have saved over 50% of our typical grocery budget. Our recycle container is practically empty and the refrigerator is sparse. The simplicity has been refreshing.

Next week is Spring Break and Melody will be home from school. I hope to do some reading and learning about Africa. Any ideas about materials for this?

r&b day 3 & day 4

In the past few days I've been working the Rhea Lana Consignment sale nonstop. I have been crawling into bed around 1:00am each night after working with my Consignment Sale friends for 12+ hours in a row. We get kinda silly after the first 8 hours. During these sales, it is difficult to eat well. There is fast food, pizza, chocolate, and coke everywhere. We barely have time to eat anything at all. So, the Rice & Beans thing didn't go so well for me on Day 3 and Day 4.

I decided to take a break for Day 3 because I was going to be at the sale all day. I was successful in staying away from chocolate, candy and soda though. And I tried to eat moderate portions. On Sunday I ate chocolate and drank coke. :( The rest of the family did pretty well. The girls stayed with my mom for one night, and she commented that they have a completely different attitude about food already. She told Melody that she might join us next year. Melody replied with, "But Grammy, we just started this a couple of days ago, so you can join us this year!" Haha!

r&b day 2

This morning I was optimistic about breakfast. The plan was warm rice with butter, milk and sugar. It didn't go so well. Leah took a bite and liked it, but then was not able to swallow the bite for about five minutes. Weird. Melody forced herself to eat a few bites and then pushed it away. They ended up asking for bean burritos for breakfast! I ate a bowl of the sweet rice and about ten minutes later my stomach felt gross. Any tips out there on rice recipes for breakfast? We may end up making this Rice & Beans & Egg Month.

For tonight I have a bean soup simmering on the stove top in my beloved red Le Creuset. I was too busy to cook dry beans today so I did the following:

Sauteed 1 red bell pepper, 1 green bell pepper, 1 red onion in some oil. Add the following all undrained -- can of corn, can of green chilies, can of diced tomatoes, and can of rotel. Added 2 T chili powder, 1 t cumin, salt. Drained and rinsed two cans of beans - one red, one black -- and added them to everything else. It has been simmering for a couple of hours. We will eat this with tortillas and sour cream.

All of the canned ingredients were already in my pantry. We also already have sour cream. Toward the end of the month the meals will be more simply rice and beans, but for now I'm using what we have. We will also have cantaloupe with our meal.

Last night I went to bed hungry! I ate dinner at 5:30 and didn't go to bed until 1:30am. As I worked at the Rhea Lana Consignment sale late into the night, I was tempted to eat chips and candy. I kept thinking of our beautiful friends in Sudan and I'm proud to say I was able to resist the temptation of all of that chocolate! Maybe my entirely empty stomach this morning was the reason the rice didn't settle well.

rice & beans, day 1

We are eating Rice & Beans for the month of March. It's radical and we are excited about it. Each day we are driven by food cravings. Often after school I take the kids to Sonic during happy hour to get slushies. They ask for a piece of candy about five times each day. Sugar is true north in our home.

For the month of March we are hoping to refocus ourselves. We are going to attempt to eat rice and beans for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Our goal is to simplify our meals in order to save money and to join our brothers and sisters around the world who eat rice and beans all of the time.

Today has been Day One. I have to tell you that we had scrambled eggs for breakfast! Not rice and beans. Last night I didn't prepare and there was no time to make rice this morning. Eating scrambled eggs was a step toward simplicity for us. Typically each of us eats something different for breakfast. I am literally spinning around in the kitchen trying to prepare everyone's custom meal. Crazy, right? So this morning I beat 8 eggs in a measuring cup, scrambled them up, and served them to all five of us. There were mild complaints, but everyone ate and it was simple. Tomorrow morning we'll try some rice for breakfast.

We will also be eating fruits and vegetables. I told Melody that her after school snack would be a bowl of apples and carrots on the table when she got home. She said, "That sounds awesome!" For her lunches she has the option to pack a lunch of rice and beans or eat the school lunch. Before this month Melody never wanted to eat the school lunches. Now that we are doing rice and beans month she is happy to eat them! Her enthusiasm to eat school lunches and have apples/carrots for her snack are evidence of an adjusting perspective.

More to come!

leah is funny

The other day we arrived to pick up Melody from school a few minutes early.

I said, We are early.

Leah responded with, What does that mean?

Leah asked Jesus to live in her heart...

Two nights ago I sang There Is A Redeemer to the girls at bedtime. It is a standby, the girls know it and sing along. I love Keith Green songs. After singing it I asked Melody,

'Do you ever sing that song at recess...'

She replied, 'no.'

She has told me about singing other songs at recess like, 'If you like it than you should've put a ring on it....' I told her if she wanted to sing songs like There Is A Redeemer at recess, it would let people know she is a Christian.

At this point Leah asked, 'Am I a Christian...'

I explained that when she asked Jesus into her heart and believed that He died on the cross to take away her sins, she would then be a christian. She shyly listened with the covers pulled up close to her chin. I asked her if she wanted to pray and she said maybe tomorrow at the dinner table, which is when she usually prays.

The next day at supper, she asked if she could pray before the meal. She bowed her head and said the following prayer...

Lord Jesus, please come live in my heart and take my sins away so that I can be a Christian and that we can spend the night at Pearson's house.

Chad, Melody and I were all beaming and laughing at the end of her prayer. She said, 'NOW I AM A CHRISTIAN.' She was overflowing with joy. It was awesome. We rode bikes to Maggie Moos to celebrate with cotton candy ice cream. This morning at breakfast she repeated. 'I am a Christian.' So sweet. Thank you Jesus for Your work on our kids.

Last Sunday at church Chad and I had a powerful time of tearful prayer for our kids. The very next day Leah inquired about giving her life to Jesus.

A funny side note.... Pearson is a four year old in our small group through church. They attend the same preschool and see each other five days a week now between school, small group and church. It is so cute to see our kids grow in their relationships with the kids at small group. This weekly time is one of their favorites things each week. We are blessed.

first grade conversations

Melody came home today and said,

At recess today there was a girl just sitting in the rocks. I went over to her and said, "Don't you want to play on the playground?" The girl replied, "Yeah, but I don't have a friend." And Mel said, "Well we can be friends." So we walked over the the playground and then she just found another friend and didn't play with me!!

She called PE, PG.

She called the PE teachers, Gym Owners.

The teachers mouth is continually "on" so Melody hasn't had a chance to ask any of her questions because her mouth is always, "off."

She is cracking me up!!!

first day of school

Today was Melody's first day of 1st grade. Since we homeschooled last year this was our first time to drop her off at school. We had a fun time getting ready for the big day. Her outfit is one of my all time favorites; purchased at Rhea Lana Consignment sale.



Sister shot. Leah being her silly goofy self, first thing in the morning.



Pretty nails! I attempted to paint flowers on her finger nails. Need more practice. She was like, "Paint rainbows! A sun! Tulip!"



Cutest toes in the world.



Favorite photo of the day. The school is in the background. It's a lovely facility, only a couple of years old. I'm so glad Chad was able to be part of our morning. The general feel of the school was excited, happy, welcoming, lots of smiles. Lots of families, babies, younger siblings, etc. I met one mom who had a mug of coffee in her hand through the whole ordeal. It was her fourth kid, not first.





The day was super long for me. I felt like Melody was away for a week instead of eight hours. I kept looking at the clock, thinking about her. Leah, Logan and I had a low key day at home. Leah was content and didn't seem bothered by the absence of Melody. I waited for 30 minutes in the pick up line at 3:00. As I approached the school, I could see Melody sitting with all of the other kids. When it was her turn, the lady with the mega phone yelled, MELANIE MATHIS!?, right in front of her. She climbed into the van, saying, "It was HORRIBLE. The whole day was HORRIBLE."

She proceeded to tell me all the of reasons it was so bad. She had to sit at the end of the table at lunch and there was a bar where her feet where suppose to be, so she had to sit criss-cross-applesauce. At recess she didn't get a turn on the swings and there were all of these rules about how to slide and waiting your turn. (Haha!) One funny thing she said was, "My teacher said that when her mouth is on, our mouthes have to be off, but her mouth was on the whole day! She never gave any of us a turn!"

By the end of the day, she had filled us in on many good, fun things about the day. Her teacher read three books to them. One was a "chapter book" and her teacher did the voice for a little girl. Another was a Kevin Henkes book, Chrysanthemum, one of our favorites. After that book they got to do a piece of artwork that had their absolutely perfect name on it. As she got into the van she was holding her backpack in front of her, unzipped. I said, "It would be easier to carry that if you zipped it up." She replied, "I know. I didn't have time because they kept saying, 'Hurry up!' "

I think she will do fine in her class this year. I think today was just crazy and overwhelming because it was the first day. I'm hopeful. Part of me feels like saying, "See! A couple of hours of homeschooling a day is a breeze!"

....cleaning topic continued

Today we needed to do some cleaning. I was dreading it because of the previous post. I didn't know how to approach the tasks with Leah. I wanted so badly to have success and not failure in our work together. At lunch, Chad talked to the girls about the afternoon and what was expected of them. An hour later, we started in their room. I am happy to report that Leah worked hard! I will never fully understand why one day is better than another, but here are some insights into the success:

• I was in a good mood. Who wants to clean with a cranky mommy? I didn't bark orders at Leah. I tried to go slow and give her one task at a time.

• I worked with them. The three of us worked together while the baby napped. We were able to focus on the job. When 15 month old Logan is awake, it is a constant job to keep little things out of his path, especially in the girls' room. It is easy to get distracted and frustrated.

• Chad and I prepped them with both encouragement and consequences. Chad let them know what was expected of them before we began. Leah knew he was going to ask how it went when he got home that evening. I only had to use this information once though, "What are we going to tell Daddy when he gets home about how you helped?"

It worked! Glory, hallelujah, their room is CLEAN and there were no tears, revoked privileges, spankings, or yelling.

days vs weeks

The weeks are absolutely flying by. But the days are so long! Each night lately, bedtime has been a battle with the girls. I read, sing, lay with them awhile, and then try to leave. They always need more... questions, drinks, whatever. I can barely make it out of their room without a clinched jaw and one of them in tears.

Another challenge. Leah will not help clean up. Melody has always enjoyed cleaning up, so she does it all of the time. She keeps their room tidy with no instructions. The other day we had a showdown after they had played with Play-Dough for two hours. Leah would NOT help clean up. I told her that if she didn't help she would not be able to spend the night with Grammy as planned. She chose to forfeit the privilege rather than clean up. !!!???! In the end, she still didn't help clean up either. I've been thinking on it all week and I can't figure it out. How do I motivate my four year old to work hard? Is this a birth order thing? I want to empower her to be a hard working and capable person. The other day she said, "Melody likes to clean up. I hate to clean up." I do not like those labels.

Any insight is welcome! Thanks!

back to school

July is here and I can't stop thinking about Back To School. It is a loaded phrase, isn't it? School supplies, fall weather, new shoes, what to wear, school buses driving by, first impressions, new names, but most of all -- the end of summer. We have decided for Melody to attend public school for first grade. Never before have I considered summer time to be short. This summer the weeks are clicking by faster than I can believe. August 15 is approaching with the speed of a Boeing 777.

Kindergarden was a good year. I will remember it for the highs, not the lows. Logan was tiny. Melody was able to spend everyday with him at home. They have bonded in a way that makes a mother's heart sing. Learning how to read happened side by side in the leather chair. Some reading days involved writhing on the floor in a puddle of tears. (Her, not me.) Those days would hit me hard. I would have a sinking feeling in my stomach for the rest of the day. Questions of How To Motivate My Kid were a general topic between me and my friends.

Children's literature became a topic I could discuss with others. Before last year I did not know of one children's author. Now I have several favorites. Robert Mcloskey, Virginia Lee Burton, Ludwig Bemelmans, and of course Laura Ingalls Wilder to name a few. I do not feel alien in the public library anymore.

Here is a photo of us doing school on a blanket in the front yard last September.



And one of Logan in his month four splendor.

a new phase

I remember when Melody was born. The first two years after, trying it figure out what kind of mom I was. What bothered me? What did I love? What did I stand for? Who was I?

After awhile it fell into place. I hit a groove. I embraced it. It was easy and good.

The other day I was holding Logan, standing in his room, swaying and humming. He was relaxed against me. We were both soaking each other in. It felt SO GOOD. I caught a glimpse of us in the mirror and I thought, "I know how to do this. I know how to be mama to a baby."

I am at a new cross road as a mom. I have a six year old. School age. What kind of mom am I? What kind of education do I subscribe to? What is important to me? What do I expect? What do I want? I don't know yet. I am waiting; trying to figure it out.

11 months later

It's been almost a year since I wrote anything here. 2010 was a difficult year, but a blessed one.

We had a baby boy! Logan Ralph Mathis was born on May 8, 2010. We had him at home. It was a faster labor than the others, but not easier. Five intense hours with few breaks. The birth experience left me shaken, but not traumatized. I am glad to have had three home births, but am stunned when I think back at the memories. They are so hard. The adjustment to a new baby had subsided and life is easier again. At 8 months, Logan is a joy for each of us. Melody often says, "I am soooooo glad God gave us Logan!"

We now live in Fayetteville! We bought a foreclosure and are fixing it up as we live in it. I am excited to show some before/after pictures here. Nothing is complete yet, so the after pictures will be a work in progress as well. I am home schooling Melody for kindergarden. She is easy to teach. The difficulty of home schooling for me is the same struggle as everything else. Finding a routine, sticking to it, being disciplined, being organized. I tend to blame these struggles on our unfinished house even though I've always had these downfalls. I am striving for good days in the midst of the chaos. The good days are really good and keep me going down this road for now.

the long awaited rainbow cake post

I made a five layer rainbow cake for Melody's 5th birthday this year. It was my biggest cake endeavor to date. I spent 3 hours on it. This cake was my inspiration. I love this perfect photo so much that I am thinking about framing it for my house. My cake did not turn out so perfect, but it was a success, thanks to Chad's help.

Here is the finished product:


Here are five bowls stacked and ready for food coloring:


Mixing:


Baking:


Cooling:


Here is where things got tricky (and I got tired). I used 9 cups of powdered sugar for the frosting, and still ran out. I used too much between the layers and things started to lean. Chad shored things up with these skewers and we let it sit overnight.


The next morning (hours before the party) I remembered I had some heavy whipping cream in the fridge. I whipped it up and covered the cake again with more frosting goodness.


The outcome was pretty!


And this face made it all worth it. She was pretty excited for me to cut into the rainbow surprise. It was the sweetest cake I've ever tasted, with all the frosting, but I didn't make this cake for taste... it was for looks.


Here are two more fun cake ideas. I might use this one next. It looks easier. And this one could be fun for Valentines Day. While we are on the subject of edible rainbows, check out these pancakes.

leah's birthday

Here I am again, after my longest blog hiatus ever. The past several months have been busy. Here is a bullet point list of what's up....

• In November and December we celebrated three birthdays, one anniversary, Thanksgiving and Christmas. We went to Houston for Thanksgiving and Illinois for Christmas.

• Chad loves his new job. He is more fulfilled in his work than ever before.

• We have buyers for our house!! After being on the market for 5 months, we have buyers. Keeping it clean enough for showing was a huge task for our family.

• We will move to Fayetteville this month! I can't believe it's finally going to happen! Chad and I are both excited to live near everything again. We can't wrap our brains around the idea of being right down the street from everything. We know there are things we'll miss about being in the country, too. We'll still have 12 acres out here, so that will help.

• I am 27 weeks into this pregnancy already. We are having a BOY. We are all thrilled to meet this little one in May. We have no name yet, but a short list of possibilities. I'm seeing my same midwife, Jennifer Creel, and am having a good pregnancy. I'm trying not to gain 55-60 lbs this time!

Below are pictures of Leah on her birthday on November 11. She asked for a dark blue cake. I couldn't figure out how to pull that off with my light blue food coloring, so this is what we ended up with. I used mini m&ms and sprinkles on top of light blue heavy whipped cream. Underneath all of the blue was the Hershey cocoa chocolate cake I've made at least 10 times in the past two years since I discovered the recipe on the can. No joke.





Coming up in the next few days is a long awaited rainbow cake post from Mel's 5th birthday party. And after that I'll post some pregnancy pictures.

leah's love

Leah is a mama's girl. She often chooses to hang out when me when we are in groups with other kids. These two photos show a fun progression of her affection and her goofy humor. She makes me laugh everyday.

the update

Chad was laid off in April. From May until August he did various side jobs for our church, including remodeling a building for a new thrift store in Fayetteville. Our church offered him a job as a manager at this store. A couple of weeks ago he decided to accept the offer and we are now employed again! I immediately became excited about start the adoption process again. We were on hold the entire summer -- from Memorial Day until Labor Day. I decided I'd call our agency, Gladney, on Tuesday after Labor Day, with the news. Tuesday came and I felt weird. I decided to take a pregnancy test before calling. The test was positive. We are pregnant!

I was shocked into tears at the sight of the positive pregnancy test. I told Chad and his response was a surprised smile, "This is good news." he said with emotion. His positive statement brought me from tears to joy in a matter of minutes. I was sad about the adopted baby. I have been waiting for him for almost a year now. At the same time, we have been ready for another baby for a long time. We didn't expect it to happen this way, though!

I am due around May 10, which seems like a really long time away. The other night Melody asked, "Mommy, will we have to wait 30 years for this baby to get here?" Having a 4 year old in the process with us is fun. She talks about the baby all of the time. We gather she is thinking about the new baby nonstop! She even dreams about the baby. The other day we were talking about girl names. She said she liked the name Flower. I explained there are many flower names people use for girl names. Rose, Daisy, Lily, etc.

She said, "I know what we can do. We will write down all of the flower names. Then we can spread them all over the couch in rows. Then me and you and Daddy will look at them together and decide what to name the baby!"

I finally called Gladney to tell them the news. Our caseworker, Jessica, was amazing. In fact, she knows just how I feel because she got pregnant while in the adoption process as well. Gladney's guidelines state that we are not able to pursue adoption while pregnant. I am okay with this because I cannot imagine doing both pregnancy and adoption at the same time! We will be able to start the adoption again when this new baby is six months old, if we choose. For now that is our tentative plan.


For now I will leave you with a photo of Melody, Leah and myself. A sweet friend of ours, Hope, did a photo shoot in July. I have outtles of pictures to share with you over the next few weeks.

big update coming soon...