I am eleven weeks pregnant now. The baby is the size of a large bouncy ball. I like this mind picture. I can just see him/her bouncing around in my belly. Speaking of, I think I can already feel the baby fluttering around in there. I did not feel Melody move until the 20th week, and by that point it was a definite JAB/KICK. This time around, I'm more aware because I know what it can feel like. I liken it to a butterfly's wing fluttering against the wall of my uterus. That or a carbonated beverage; bubbly and tingly.
Since the past post I've continued to feel better about being pregnant. I am excited about the baby now. It's still not the cloud nine utopia I felt with Melody's pregnancy, but that's okay. I'm not expecting the exact same experience.
During the past week there have been a few nights when my mind is full of blessing and awe. I think of the things to come and a giddy contentment spreads throughout my whole being. It's a new sense of wellbeing that I've not experienced before. Now that I have Melody I know the goodness motherhood brings. Maybe that knowledge is the reason for these night time episodes of mind boggling peace. I think it must be a little bit like being high? The thoughts are not specific. It's more of a state of mind. Thoughts like these float in and out: Four instead of three. Tiny weightless baby sleeping on my chest. Siblings playing together in the bathtub. Breastfeeding again. Chad as a new daddy again.
The wild thing is, these are the same things I freak out about during the day, when my mind is fully functioning. Because of this, I'm thankful for the night time peace that comes at the end of these tiring pregnant days.
Now for an update on Melody...
She had a fever for two days last weekend. It made for two hard nights, one of which daddy helped out. By Sunday we were all zombies. Today she was herself again saying her new words with gusto, "I know!" "Pretty." "Nite-nite." We were at the grocery store and she began growling at me like a bear. I growled back and we gave everyone at the deli a show. During the show, I noticed a huge white mass in her mouth. She has a new molar! It's massive!! It's on the bottom and I assume it was the cause of her fever. I felt relief knowing the fever's cause, and sypmathy for the pain she endured as the tooth broke through. Looking back, there has been more drool and chewing action lately.
Each day her coordination and verbal skills grow. She has a couple long strands of beads that she loves. She puts them around her neck by herself and wears them for hours at a time. At naptime I take them away, to her dismay. Upon waking up, she is always delighted to receive them again.
She is getting more dominant and strong willed each week. When told "no" she takes a long time to ponder the situation. She bends her head low, furrows her brow, and comtemplates the item that is off limits. If distraction does not occur, she'll slowly reach out to touch the offending object again. Folks, we do not have a people-pleaser on our hands.